Sadness, Depression, and Drought

The drought in California is killing me. Not actually killing me. Metaphorically killing me.

Killing me softly.


Having no water in California and watching the green grass die is just sad. My parents drove me to San Francisco a week ago. Just seeing all the yellow and brown fields everywhere+seeing all the cows die+orchard trees being cut down=why is life so depressing?????

People are always like “the weather in Chicago sucks”. The weather kinda sucks in California too. I mean at least Chicago has water. No water=no life. Literally.

Everyday, I expect to open the window and see green grass. But nowadays, when I open the window, all I see is brown. Brown. And what color is it guys? Brown.

California is the perfect example of no H2o.

I asked my friend on the matter. You could call it a 40 second interview.

Me-“Drought is sad.”

Friend-“I checked the weather.”

Me-“Why? You know its always gonna be sunny.”

Friend”I’m checking the nearest cities to see if they are getting rain because I swear, I will drive to that city and soak in rain. I literally just need to be completely wet and be cleansed. I want our streets to be cleansed, everyone to be cleansed, I just want California to be cleansed.”

Me-“Wow. That was deep.”

At one point I was literally like:

I blame the drought for my unsettling unhappiness these past few weeks. Its almost as if life thought it was to cool to plan a sneak attack on me. Yeah, life is kind of a butt.

I sincerely hope that it will rain soon. Sincerely. I don’t know how much longer I can take this. The drought has been going on for four years and I am sick and tired of it. I’m really close to just getting a nice, cold bucket of water and dumping it on myself and pretend that it is rain. Wait a second…that would be the ice bucket challenge all over again.

Oh well. I’m desperate.

Rain, rain, please come today. Thank you in advance.

13 thoughts on “Sadness, Depression, and Drought

  1. Hey this is deep. I feel you on this subject. I’ve been on a deep depression too well due to let downs by former friends to a recent heart break from a girlfriend, this drought in california served to subdue my happiness.

    Thus it’s taking a huge toll on my life. And funny you mention chicago because that’s where I’ve been escaping to every winter to get out of my “unseasonal ” blues from prolong heat and drought. I can’t take it here either.

    Well if ever you wanna talk shoot me an email. Just knowing we are not alone can help us through this rough spiritual struggle.


    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah its always hard but its nice to know that we’re not alone in this world. I’ve been facing a bit of troubles myself but it will all get better in time. I sincerely hope the same goes for you.

      Thank you so much. I’ll definitely consider the offer to email you sometime.

      “Only rainbows after rain.” šŸ™‚

      -Joanna Xue


  2. Hey Joanna, how are you holding up in this nasty unprecedented drought? Me I’m taking it by seeing g my therapist and treating myself the best that no other can.

    Times like these we need to lean on God. I feel I’m vicariously here for you. Last week I was in chicago where it was snowy frigid and it took me away from this pain hole here in california.

    Email me anytime @


    • Well, these days I’ve been digging into a lot of books and listening to music. Get my mind off things you know? Thanks for asking. I do hope that things are getting better for you! šŸ™‚


      • Awww thanks. You know who helps me? I have a cousin who I talk to who lives in Chicago. Just staying connected everyday with someone I care about keeps me going. And by these replies I feel you vicariously helping me too. Thanks for your replies.


      • It’s always nice to know that family will always be there for you. Same here. Although sometimes my mother drives me crazy, I know that everything she does and everything she says is for my own good.


      • Exactly. Tough love is sometimes hard to be receptive to in a positive way.

        Anyways I’m happy that I got my seasonal fix by going to Chicago during the coldest winters ever. I take in the good whenever it is present and I pray that I can find peace in my present situation too. I’m glad things seem like its going well for you. I hope it continues. I’ll be praying for you.


      • I’ve actually never been to Chicago. What’s it like? These days, I’ve been listenng and playing a lot of music. Its strange how relaxing it can be to play a few keys on a piano. The same goes for you! šŸ™‚


      • Chicago is awesome. City life, eating pizza, there’s hotels where you can have tea hour if you do tea because I do. Lots of observation decks and my favorite is the 95th floor on top of the John Hancock building called the Signature Room.

        Oh how nice you play music. I sing in a choir in church. I’m glad you find piano playing as an outlet.


      • Wow seems interesting! Traveling definitely helps! I remember going to China a few summers back. Even though it was gruesomely humid I loved the people, the culture, and most importantly the food there. I sometimes wish I could go again, but nowadays, the air pollution is really bad. It’s not the same you know? Music helps me escape. I’ve always liked singing but high notes are so hard to reach.


      • Oh wow. China huh. Yeah my family are from the Philippines but I was born here in Vallejo, ca but it’s humid there too in the Philippines.

        Anyways music is good too. I love smooth jazz.


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